Wired to Lead? Neurodivergence in Early Childhood Education Leadership

Part 1: The Invisible Layer

Let’s start at the very beginning: What is neurodivergence? And why is it important to understand neurodivergence in adults, not just how it looks in the children we serve?

Well, if you’ve ever walked into a room, forgotten why, then rearranged the furniture for the next 2 hours instead… you might already be living in this neurodivergent world (no diagnosis required 🤪)

Neurodivergence is an umbrella term that refers to people whose brains function differently from what society considers "typical." This includes individuals with ADHD, autism, dyslexia, anxiety, and sensory processing differences, just to name a few. Instead of thinking in a linear, organized, one-thing-at-a-time kind of way, neurodivergent people might experience the world as a constant swirl of thoughts, sensations, emotions, and connections that can feel both brilliant and overwhelming.

In contrast, neurotypical people are those whose brains align with the dominant societal expectations for attention, behavior, learning, and processing. The world—from schools to workplaces to social expectations—is largely designed to support neurotypical ways of thinking.

And when our brain doesn’t fit into this nice, tidy little box, we start to think there is something wrong with us. This is because a lot of neurodivergent adults don’t know they’re neurodivergent. Especially women. Especially in caregiving professions. Why? Because many of us were undiagnosed, misdiagnosed, or simply told we were disorganized, dramatic, lazy, emotional, or needed to try harder.

And so, we grew up learning to mask these tendencies—to blend in, follow the perceived “rules”, and hide the ways our brains struggled to keep up. We became high-achievers, perfectionists, people-pleasers. We got very good at working harder to function. Until we couldn’t anymore.

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Sound familiar? You’re not alone.

At the height of my burnout as a director, I found myself sitting on the kitchen floor, overwhelmed and sobbing. I had two Master’s degrees, plenty of experience in the field—and yet I was crumbling. I kept thinking, “I should be able to do this. What is wrong with me?”

We all know that the Director role asks too much of anyone. But the way I was reacting—the level of mental noise, the constant tension, the way I could create a promising new process but then forget to follow-up on it the next week—that felt like another layer of difficulty added to the job.

I was venting about these struggles to a close friend one evening when she recommended therapy. She explained what a difference it made in her life and thought it could help me too. I was resistant at first and it wasn’t until she suggested it multiple times that I finally caved. But what I didn’t know at the time was that my therapist would change my life within the first few sessions when she asked, “Has anyone ever talked to you about ADHD?”

I laughed. I had always loved school. I was a straight-A student. I wasn’t the child bouncing off the walls and could easily focus on topics that I found interesting But then she explained inattentive ADHD and executive dysfunction—and suddenly, it all made sense.

I may have been a great student, but I was also the girl who couldn’t focus on the lesson unless I was doodling, taking notes, or knitting in class. The one who constantly interrupted conversations with friends because my thoughts moved too fast. I could spend hours hyperfocusing on a new, challenging hobby, but couldn’t ever remember where I put my keys. I got so lost in my own head I’d miss highway exits. Frequently.

But it turns out my therapist was onto something. It wasn’t laziness. I wasn’t a quitter. I was just working with a different kind of brain. And as I grew up, the signs were missed because I didn't fit the mold of what ADHD “should” look like. It’s the reason so many women are undiagnosed, or misdiagnosed with anxiety or depression instead. (Read more about that HERE.)

And all the things I thought made me “bad” at the job? They were just unmet needs in a role that wasn’t designed for how many of us process the world.

Maybe you’ve felt this too. Maybe you’ve blamed yourself for being inconsistent, disorganized, or too sensitive. Maybe you’ve wondered how everyone else seems to handle it—and assumed it must be a ‘you’ problem. But what if you’re not “too much” or “not enough”—you’re just wired differently in a world that was never designed with you in mind?

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Why Neurodivergent Adults Are Drawn to Early Childhood Education

For all its chaos and unpredictability, early childhood education is one of the few places where being nonlinear, emotionally intuitive, and creatively adaptive isn’t just accepted—it’s required.

It’s sensory, emotional, and human. No two days are the same. There’s constant movement, real connection, and space to show up as your whole self.

Many neurodivergent adults find deep purpose in early childhood work. The job pulls on their strengths: empathy, problem-solving, authentic relationships, and an ability to sit in complexity. They might struggle with scheduling or documentation, sure—but when it comes to responding to a child mid-meltdown or rewriting a schedule on the fly? They’re incredible.

However, in a role that is already asking too much of one person, the stakes are even higher when you add in the invisible layer of a neurodivergent mind. While our strengths allow us to appear superhuman in the role—those same traits can lead to collapse when there are no systems set up to account for executive functioning struggles, sensory regulation, or emotional burnout.

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So What Do I Do Now?

Understanding how your unique brain operates is the first step in creating systems that actually work—for you.

This week, I want you to get curious. Start noticing what drains you, what energizes you, and when your brain feels most aligned with the work. Write it down. Look for trends. The more you understand your wiring, the sooner you can begin to build supports around it.

Because neurodivergent or not, we’re all a little kooky for choosing this job (ECE Directors Unite!). But if you’re feeling like the systems you’ve been given don’t quite fit, you’re not alone—and you’re not broken.

And you will need that list, because next week we’ll dig in a little more about leading in early childhood education with a brain that works differently. We’ll unpack the strengths, the challenges, and the small shifts that can make this impossible job feel just a little more possible.

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